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Fun Stuff: Stitch Jokes
Note: There used to be an IMDB board on such, but unfortunately, it died and is probably offline for good. T_T
And to be honest, not all of the jokes are mine, but the ones in italics are definitely mine. "HECKLER: LIVE" Funny insults, cracks and one-liners! (Plus some 'Jumba's so...'
jokes!) When Experiment 626 does push-ups, he actually pushes the ground down. Experiment 626 doesn't play kick the can; he plays kick the keg. Every time Experiment 626 stubs his toe, he rips up concrete. Experiment 626 gets really touchy when somebody asks him, "What's the matter, Stitch? Feeling a little blue?" What Experiment 626 thought was a mirror was actually Experiment 624 (she had spilt blue paint all over herself). Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story. It just so happened that Experiment 601 accidentally swallowed a
live turtle one day, and when it popped out, it was six feet tall and knew karate. Experiment 221 tries to avoid getting ideas, because he's afraid he'll blow up that little light bulb and hurt somebody.
Carmen [Experiment 123] should be the next Chiquita banana spokeswoman! Lilo: What's the difference between Stitch and a pig? Angel, Stitch, and Sparky are all telling each other jokes. Sparky: Jumba's so dumb, he'd get lost in a round room. Clip's so hairy, that if I shaved her, I could knit enough scarves than the Local Knitting Club could ever acheive! "SO MUCH PUN!" Caution: groan-hazard! What kind of dessert would Hammerface make? Wanna hang out with Belle? 'Hamesterviel' sounds like a lunchmeat made from rodents. Is it nice having Snooty as a roomate? Yang: Didya hear? Bonnie: Your name should be Algebra. Even when he isn't sad, Stitch still looks blue. Mr.Stenchy is like rotten food, he stinks. Why is hard to talk to Cannonball? He keeps on butting in! What did Mr.Stenchy say when the wind changed? It all comes back to me now! Gigi: Sorry, Slick, but I just can't buy it. Which experiment is spoiled rotten? Mr.Stenchy - he's a little stinker. What happens when you cross a blue alien and this joke site? STITCHes of laughter! What did Sparky say when he tried to catch a pesky squirrel but couldn't? Stitch: Have you seen Sparky lately? Stitch: Lilo want to know what word sounds different when cap...cap... What do you call it when Jumba grabs his rod and heads on down to the old watering hole? Sparky flies into a bar. What happens? Which experiment is the brightest? What happens if you leave Stitch and Angle alone together too long? Nosy: Hey, Sparky! Did you hear about Frenchfry's new cooking show? Bonnie: Hey, Clyde! What do you do when an actor gives a bad performance in Hungary? "LET'S LEARN FROM..." Anecdotes and humorous roleplay One time, Experiment 501 downed an entire bag of Skittles; it was learned that day that Skittles cause aliens whose powers
are water-based to become extremely hyper and/or insane. Nowadays, Experiment 502 will not allow any Skittles on their island.
Experiment 625 absolutely hates having others talk to him when he's on a plane. All he wants to do is take a nap, but all
these people are always asking him, "What do you do?" and trying to strike up a conversation. So, 625 decided to answer their
question "What do you do?" wirh the reply "I'm a brain surgeon". Amazingly, the conversations would end! One day, just as 625 was about to start dreaming about a gi-normous ham sandwich, a man came and sat next to him. The man
asked 625, "What do you do?" 625 replied, "I'm a brain surgeon." The man exclaimed, "So am I!" Experiment 150 had had enough. He was tired of being bossed around by Experiment 149 day in and day out! One day, he heard
that wives should submit to their husbands...well, Experiment 149 wasn't exactly a wife, per se, but they lived together enough
for her to start submitting to him! That night, Experiment 150 stormed up to Experiment 149. Placing her on a talbe so that they could see eye-to-eye, Experiment
150 boomed, "Now, look here, Bonnie! I'm the man of this relationship, and from now on, what I say goes! And I say that YOU
are going to fix ME a glorious feast, and then YOU'RE going to draw ME a warm bath, so that I can relax! Then after that,
guess who's going to brush my fur and fix me up all nice-like?" Experiment 149, hands on her hips, gave Experiment 150 a level glare and replied, "I'd guess the funeral director." Experiment 625 learned that, in order to avoid brain surgeons, he had to move from first class to coach. On this certain
trip, he noticed that no one was sitting next to him. Experiment 625 grinned: "Now I can lay down and relax!" he said. But then, just as the doors were closing, something happened. "Oh, no," groaned Experiment 625. A woman--with a crying baby--had jumped onto the plane at the last second. "Oh, Lord, don't let her sit next to me!" Experiment 625 prayed. She sat next to him, placing the baby in the seat between them. Right away, Experiment 625 could tell that this woman LOVED
to talk. "So!" she chriped, "What do you do?" Experiment 625 decided to tell her the truth; that he was a galley officer on a Federation ship BRB-9000 for the Captian
of the Intergalactic Guard. As they conversed, the baby began to put everything in his mouth and suck: the seatbelt, the magazines,
Experiment 625's arm... ...Experiment 625 didn't think the baby was sucking so hard until he looked down and noticed that several of his new tatoos
were missing. A few hours passed, when suddenly, a smell arose from the seat between Experiment 625 and the woman. The woman gave an apologetic smile to Experiment 625. She asked, "Do you mind if I change him here? It's only a wet one."
What was Experiment 625 to do? He had already told her he liked kids! The woman changed the baby there. Surprise, suprise, surprise. It wasn't just a wet one. The kid looked like he had eaten an entire bottle of mustard! Needless to say, Experiment 625's experience in coach was no better than the experience he had in first class. And, to
this day, Experiment 625 refuses to put mustard on his sandwiches. Stitch: Which came first - chicken or egg? Stitch: Hey, Lilo. Are caterpillars good to eat? Stitch, Angel, Lilo and Sparky all were sitting in a tree. You know, Cannonball didn't always look the way he does now. His original purpose was to steal and eat all your food. Well, once he and a bunch of other experiments were playing tug of war. He decided to tie the rope around his big old stomach.
Bad Idea. Jumba changed his purpose and now Cannonball bounces on what used to be in front of him. Lilo: Stitch went to a play one time and said that it tickled him. *There is a fanfiction version of this joke that exists somewhere on the internet* All day long, Sparky was tricking Experiments left and right. It seemed as though no one could escape his Okay Game. Stitch, meanwhile, watched the procedures with great intent. After he saw Sparky make Angel lay flat on her back, a plan
formed in his mind. Sparky saw that Stitch already knew how to play the Okay Game. *JOKE NOTE: The Okay Game is actually been going on at the joke-author's school
for about a month since the joke has been written in late 2005-early 2006. Whoever wrote this quotes that s/he was sick
and tired of it, and had haven't had to fall flat on his/her back yet (but been hit quite a few times, though)... so
this joke was his/her personal revenge on that 'annoying game'!* Stitch: It's a bird, it's a plane.. Sparky: Can I change clothes now? I mean this was fun at first but now I'm starting to feel stupid, really
stupid. Plus the spandex is giving me a rash and the tights are giving me a wedgie. (Five minutes later) "Where else does it fit?" Anything else miscellaneous or perhaps other fans opinions! Carmen's hat looks delicious! I want to see Gantu do the Cha-cha Slide. How many of Sparky does it take to fix a lightbulb? Stitch was playing with Nani's makeup. Wanna know how I knew that? What happens if all the cousins are sitting in a tree, and then it falls on them? What do you get when you cross a macaw with Stitch? Why did Angel paint her toenails rainbow colors? What happens when you give Sparky M&M's? What do you get when you cross Stitch with a foodfight? Three blind Experiments were sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! Two blind Experiments were sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! One blind Experiment was sitting on a rock. And then Stitch pushed one off! NO!! No blind Experiments were sitting on as rock. And then they all beat up Stitch for pushing them off! NO!! Angel was playing snake charmer one time. PLEAKELY JOKES! Because everyone likes to pick on the one-eyed star! Why did Pleakley cross the road? His wig was on the other side. How many Pleakley's does it take to ruin dinner? Just one! What happens when you leave Pleakley alone in the kitchen? You get an unappetizing meal Lilo: I figured out how we can get your dog to stop begging for food at the dinner table! "JUMBA'S CLINIC" The experiment's spin on Doctor-Doctor-Please jokes! Carmen: Jumba! I have a ringing in my ears! What should I do? *...and Yin appears* *...and Squeak appears* *...and Phantasmo appears* *...and Slushy appears* *...and Reuben appears* *... and Deforestator rushes in, frightened* |
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